I have no ******* idea
why was i doing
of what i did
you can call it
whatever
in my heart
i know
this is darkness crawling into me
I hurt my morals
my values
and I freed myself
from pain,
bitterness
to an untying knot i had
I let it go
selfish friends
meaningless acquaintances
from the past, from gone memory
i erased them
they met only in their need
used, only while they wanted
to them
i look like a shining star
with intellect
i took them
as my heart, my attention
with all sincerity
it doesn't matter
because i can't begin to notice anything

it is not enough
its never enough
it will never be enough

to this moment
now and afterward
it matters nothing
as with a heavy heart
i moved on