Mothers says that doubt is bad .
She says that If I doubt that
something would not happen
Then it might never come to be.
This is the fear that consumes me .

I am afraid that my doubts will never
Let me have all I desire most .
I am afraid to float like a feather,
Overpowered by the wind, hitting the ground
Then floating again in the wind.

I am afraid that I am a feather always pushed and shoved
To live another beings dream.
I am afraid that being an oddity will bring me persistent solitude
Even if it is unwanted .

My doubts are however masked by a painful bravado; a
Pretense, a burden, a lie.