You knocked on my door:
"You ready to go?"
And I took your hand
and we walked the streets of Teplice.

It began to rain
and we ran, laughing
Gelato on our faces,
questions giggling out of our smiles
How easy it was.

You sat close to me
in the opera house on the stairs
we were alone and you pointed
out a fake tree and said it looked like a person
"Ghost stories!" you cheered
and I said,
"Absolutely not!!"
We laughed, bumping shoulders
hearts racing more as we looked
outside of ourselves.

I joined you on your beds,
which you pushed together
foamy and orange mattresses
uncomfortable wooden space
in between us.
More the reason to scoot closer
to you.

I waited
and you froze there in the dark
and I said, "***** it"
and leaned over to kiss you.
How young and innocent it was.

Who knew, that one kiss
would lead to this
pained and empty heart
memories smoky and distant in my peripheral
I sigh again as I remove my bandaid
my knee is skinned and my arm is bruised
I've tried everything to get rid of you
but you are stuck
wedged into my heart
like a shard of mirror or glass

It's cloudy outside
I checked the weather where you are
cloudy too...slight chance of rain
same here.

I sit in a coffee shop
up to my eyes in work
and still I can't shake you.
Whatever you are.
No longer a person, but a spirit of some kind
still breathing down my neck
your cologne lingering
on my shoulder

How I wish you would go away
your prescence makes me ill
in my mind and spirit.
but I can't
can't let you be free...
no matter how hard I try
or no matter how many times I think I let go

I can't.

Probably because you said after I'm done
here, in Texas
that maybe we could start again
but I know
you wouldn't really want that.

you hate me.
don't you.

it's ok.

i hate me too.