Step by step, breath by breath, I climb closer to death. Taking a pounding by life day by day, waking up and downing down another pill or drink because though it shiny outside, all I see is grey. Questioning life, questioning myself, hell I even question God, I know the drill, time for me to take another hit by the world's rod. How I wish to turn to sod, how I wish to just jump in front of the road. I don't complain, I just say the facts, can I get hit by a plane, or hide myself in between the cracks? Suicidal tendencies, I thought I was done with thee, and no I'm not telling you this for some kind of sympathy. I'm just being real, unleashed pandora's seal, feelings are harder for me to conceal. Unleashing my inner hulk, it's takes everything to keep on hoping instead of just sitting their and continue to sulk. Every day is a constant struggle, every day I keep having on to jump over these stupid hurdles. Caught in the rain, caught up in my pain, so many times I just wanted to put a bullet through my brains. Fire, Earth, Air and Rain, how can I manage these elements, how do I keep myself sane? Head says I'm a failure, it says I'm unworthy, that I'm a traitor, that I don't deserve mercy. On the picket fence, always playing defence, trying to figure out how to make this world make sense. Getting caught up in what I hate, feels like i'm starting to rot, is this just fate? Do what I say, not what I do, which way should I choose, if I am blind how do I fix my view? Am I to die this way? Am I to stay this way? How can one live if they're are starting to decay? How do I not go array, how do I know you won't leave me astray. How do I stay classy? How can I escape this shadowy valley? Writing out what my heart is saying, but my mind set is stuck  and constantly swaying. Should I do this, should I do that, how can I attain bliss and never again hit the mat? Life isn't perfect, it takes awhile to even garner any person's respect. Life is what is what you make it, you either leave it or take it. Angels and demons, how do i remain faithful when I constantly do things that makes me no better than a heathen? These are the things I think about, I know one day I may finally get a touchdown. I'm resilient, don't worry I know that I'll hold out, you can try to punch me out, but you will never take me out!