Seldom has it occurred to me that if I never loved you, my life would not be a mess as of now, where I'm already living on the edge of death. Externally I am alive but from the inside; broken and torn apart. I cry and wish to die. I wish that death finds me in the most darkest place and extracts my soul out. The pain and bruises already ache so much that now I don't even think taking away my soul harshly would even matter. I'm already so frail from the inside. Numb and scarred, yet I'm delighted that I experienced this pain and I now distant myself from anyone who tells me that they love me.
I may not move on, but I'll hope that you experience all I've been through once and know how bad it hurts.