im un aware sometimes
of just how ****** i can be

not realizing i push you away
arms working as seperate beings from my body
i dont mean to i swear

comments on my physical apperance
my body
my clothes
arm my defenses to have nothing
but a "*******" attitude
when i never should be like that
with you

it makes me quick
bitter

"i dont care"
meant
"what do you want me to do?"

because id do it all
id do anything for you




we've been home hours
in company of silence and small talk

when i should have apologized long ago
but this all just sounds like excuses

for me being the way i am


explanation for how sorry i am