I've hit that wall, I've lost my stride. I cannot breath, ive lost my mind. My heart starts to hurt, and my pulse starts to race. My mind draws a blank, i turn red in the face. I close my eyes, but you're still there, not the image of you, but what we couldn't share. I hit the wall, and slam my fists, the pain keeps me focused, i can't feel my wrists. You've denied me my right, a right to normal life. You think you've done nothing, but you know not of my strife. My insatiable thirst, that cannot be quenched. You've caused me great pain, and you don't have the sense. The common sense to see what you've done, you're too caught up with life, but you know not of the knife. That sits in my back and digs deeper everyday, it causes me pain in so many different ways. You've done this to me, and i can never be fine. I can show you the scars, but you're too dumb to sympathize. So i sit here in pain, shaking from rage. Not wanting this poem to end, for fear of my home page. My home page is a reminder, of where I have failed. It's a reminder of my sickness, and the scars of the nails. The nails of your beliefs that were drilled into me, that haunt me to this day, and will not leave me be. For it was these beliefs that caused me great pain, that could not let me continue and have maid me insane. It is because of your docility that i could not advance, with me you never did take one single chance. You were always just there, never wanting anything more, always happy with me always opening that door. Until the day that i closed that door. You never took any risks, i couldn't take it anymore. i was sick of giving it all, and getting nothing in return. I was sick of always taking that step, and never getting a turn. But I was the one hurt in the end, stuck with my life broken, and unable to mend. Not because you left....No, thats not why at all. Broken because forever i will fall, into this never ending cycle of being the nice guy. Never acting out or letting my emotions fly. So thank you so much, for making me this way. But with this thank you, i have one more thing to say. ******* i say, with my emotions set free. Im done faking a smile, its time that you see. You should see all these scars, and this sickness that plagues me. It's the price that i pay, for being the guy. One helping of insanity, with mental problems on the side. So how about this, to make everything fair. When you get a white envelope, with a large bill in there. Take a look at it, it will most likely be from me, along with the money i owe from my insanity. So just take care of my therapy and we'll call this fair. And hopefully someday your face will be something i can bare.