When my jaw tightens something happens. I become another person. I become the me that says the right things to scare away three ******* that want to beat me up. I can write the right words to make my girl remember she is mine forever and at the same time, remind myself I wouldn't have it any other way. My soul tightens with every muscle in my face to make me become something that is more than just me. I become my own experience for myself. First time I felt my jaw hurt I took too much adderall to ace a test I hadn't studied for. My heads and hand raced to write all the things I thought to say later. Paper and writing became a newly usable canvas for my vomiting ideas. It was great and terrible and in that test I thought of everything but algebra. I never took adderall again. My jaw tightens now when I need to be that more than just me. When I doubt myself and look for the answers. When my jaw tightens my face and my head hurts. Then I can think. I think of all the things I need to say or do and how to go about them both. My more than me comes when I clench my teeth real hard and my mind goes free.