Trying hard to learn to be one,
But  love holds you fragile and undone.
Darkened and raw every memory leaves a mark,
And you sit at night regretting every time you tried to love.

Weaker than I once was I paid with heartbeats,
Which decayed and bruised the roaring reds.
Dulled to purple it taints every vein,
Trying hard to cleanse and savor freedom.

His memory holds like a furious fist,
Gripping my voice and holding me intimately.
Recoiling at every kiss,
Revolted by every ******.

Level stares and longing for sleep,
Mirror gazing assessing the damage.
This time it was only bruises,
Next time it may be brakes.