I lie here
Procrastinating
Counting down
The days
The hours
The minutes
The seconds

When do I get to leave?
Why can't I breathe anymore?
Why can't I stand to listen to a word you say?
Why can't I resist the blade on my dresser?
Why did the fire burn out?

Screaming voices surrounding me
In the small space
Where I am safe
From the torture of others
The music engulfing what used to be Ginger
Lost in the air,
The sounds,
The colors,
The pain,
The cold,
The awkward limbs tangled around me.

White bleached hair in my eyes
The point of a pencil in my arm
Tears running

I'm giving up
The stress is eating away at me
My tortured frame falls to the floor
My broken heart beats
Its final rhythm
I am leaving
Escaping this living hell
With the love of my life
Beside me
His hand in mine

Goodbye, love
I hope you miss me.