Little Box talks back With a new set of teeth And pink gums A fake nose and a wax mustache She disguises her voice To sound like Groucho
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Little Box opens up And cries to her psychiatrist I don’t know why they hate me I’m such a sweetheart I volunteer at the zoo And teach Mandarin To their bratty children
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Little Box is not happy to see you So she closes herself up for months Years, decades, and two millennia! She tacks up a sign that says Nirvana
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Little Box is undead She sleeps all day in a coffin Hands over chest At night she cruises the mall For juicy victims
She prefers type A But AB if she has to What can you say Vampires can’t be choosy She likes your stupid brother
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Little Box is on the psychiatry couch Everybody hates me Nobody loves me Little Box lies on her side And spills her guts
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What’s in Little Box A perfect orchid A chocolate-covered strawberry A new iPhone With a glittery sleeve Amber earrings from Pushkin
Keys to a new Porsche A retro Chanel brooch A Getty scion’s left ear A Czar’s ***** Gifts so rare Please don’t stare
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What’s in Little Box Rancid chow mein A sliver of cold pizza Last week’s hummus You’re a starving orphan From East Brooklyn And you’ll eat it
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So you want to **** Little Box You want to know her secret She won’t open up She won’t give it up And you are genuinely repelled By her filthy ribbon
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You want to DO the Little Box You are a sorry story You big creep Why don’t you get off the couch and find A real girlfriend!
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Boss Box White, square, and without a soul!
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Please don’t analyze Little Box She’s just cardboard clogging the landfill Her mother Precious Jade Purse Has been regifted