I burned your sandwich today.
Just like your mom used to.
Except she was just bad at making sandwiches.
I wanted to ruin your day.

The phone bill, rigidly $99.95 a month
Has overage fees on it.
You’re making a lot of private calls
For your public service job.

I think someone’s been siphoning gas
While we sleep
Because I certainly didn’t use that much,
Honey.

I’m onto you.
But I’m not bitter
Not at all.
Sorry about the sandwich.
Have a nice day
with her.