Sweet Jesus what a world we've inherited
People speed up as they drive past, hopefully afraid of what might happen to them, I like it like this, paranoia, some old greasy **** complains about a beverage, when was the last time you looked death in the eyes? Blink ******* blink. Leftover explosions shake a disinterested sky but not enough to wake it up. Dreaming. Visions of a different sky. Painted murals of a fever we called war. Interchangeable parts. Echoes. I do my best to calm people down on good days. I hold my lover close. I pay taxes. I am American. I drive fast I live for violence I am American. I'm getting twisted. Relax, I say, take it easy. I build my monuments with cigarette butts and I spill coffee on everything I own and I laugh like a madman at the news I am American. I owe a great deal to the dead. I read the writing on the wall and try to best understand what is to be done about it. I do all I think I can about it. I don't lie to myself more than I have to. Delusion of victory, screams behind glass and cries for mercy on every television. The interstate goes on like it was built to, a hundred miles or more since the last time I thought anything worthwhile. Something about the way we communicate. Weak at the base, weak in the head, revolving door of the skull shut and names crossed off of lists. Loss. Frenzy. I won't be clean til I cut my hair I won't be clean til I'm dead I am unclean American. I curse words and names and gods and laws and faces I am hateful American. I am above the law. They killed that black boy last night and probably another today they haven't killed me yet when I know they should and I know **** well why they haven't. I can only pray there will be hell to pay. I wish death on my enemies I am American. I am American I feel no guilt I didn't pay for. I walk over graves every day and don't leave flowers. I put those men there. I am death row idealist and convenience store pariah. I have no respect I have no patience I want war that I cannot pay for I am American. I have never seen an execution take place I am wealthy I am white none of this is happening to me I wish it would ******* I am American. I lay claim to beliefs with no intention to follow through on them I'm sick of hearing of all this change I am American. I am American and I want to be strong. We got the guns they got the blood are we doing this ******* thing or not I am American. I seek vengeance for far away crimes I wish death on my enemies. I am American and I will **** everyone I have to to prove it