The change shows soonest in the eyes,
Eyes that invited you to look at the world they saw—magical, raw, resplendent—
Now lost in the unfocused numbness of another day with alcohol.
They focus on a world of their own making, a limbo land not alive, not dead,
But free of all that could matter, free of caring, free of pain.

The mouth sags under those dead eyes, not angry, not sad, not anything—
Betraying the wreckage that the years of drinking have taken as their toll,
Clamped shut as if in mute appeal to those who can hear its silent message.
When the mouth opens, empty syllables escape, words devoid of meaning,
Trying to say, trying so hard to explain the emptiness inside, the need,
But nothing comes of nothing, and the words do not cohere.

Looking at her face, I grieve for what has been lost,
Wishing that some miracle would bring her back home, return her to us.
The truth will not let go: she is gone, and never coming back.
I search in vain for a face I used to know, for a love with nowhere to go,
Lost in the fog of her mind, she turns to me and nods as if in agreement.