I'm drinking
I'm so sorry
I'm smoking a cigarette
I'm so sorry
I hate you
I'm so sorry
Everything is blurry and my heart is aching for you
I finished my last cigarette and I want another
I told myself I'd quit but I also told myself I'd forget about you and look how that's going

I'm sitting in my bathtub and
I'm scrubbing until you come off of my skin
This is the third day sitting in this tub thus far and I'm still showing no sign of getting rid of the thought of you
No amount of alcohol will get your taste out of my mouth and
No amount of smoke will get your air out of my lungs
You make me feel so *****
My skin will always crawl with yours still on it

They weren't wrong when they said you'd always be a part of me
What will be, will be, and I'm having a hard time realizing that
I don't want to just live with it
I don't want to just accept the fact that someone so disgusting broke me in two and I don't even have enough strength to glue myself back together

It's been three years since
I still remember your breath like it was my own
It smelled of smoke and bad decisions
Who knew you'd teach me to follow after your footsteps
I guess this is what growing up is supposed to be about
I never thought I'd grow up without you by my side
I guess I am still growing up with you, considering you'll never leave my head
I just never pictured it to be this way
Maybe it was for the better, or maybe the worse
Either way I can't imagine my life without you in it
I don't want you anymore, please get the **** away from me and let me breathe before the thought of you suffocates me
You are the devil

I want you to cover my feet with cement and beat me senseless until I can't remember you
Maybe until I can't even remember myself
I can't remember myself much after I gave it all to you anyways, so I guess it doesn't matter