Can I be honest witchu 'ere?

I don't trust ya boy, Jakoby. He's been sniffin' around places that don't need no sniffin'. Roy's been tellin' me he's been doing the same thing there too. Coincidence? I think not, my friend. I'm just doing youse a favor and relaying this concern of mines. Did you know he slept with Tom's sister? The one with the wheelchair and weird teeth? I don't think she can even see straight. Her eyes are all cross eyed. I also heard he put his dilly in Holly, Greg's old cousin that's been livin' with his family for years. And she's not right in the head either. He's got something for them 'tards. Maybe his parents aint raised him right. They's was never around for him, poor guy.

Ditch the punk if you know what's good for ya. I'd hate to see something happen to your girl, or, you know, you.

Just sayin' is all.*

- ****