and every time I looked a stranger in the eyes and saw the flickering of what could be cannot compare to the strange wonder of no longer being alone...what I have now is a chair in a hospital room and folded blankets left on couches, the greatest gifts I ever could have received. it is enough, now, that I have loved you and have been loved. it is enough to allow for the rest of my life, and enough to convince me to live - to give up that fear, that argument, that passionless sorrow. All those books I read that spoke of a love that triumphed over all fear, I thought I knew what those words meant. I have not scraped even the beginnings of the atoms that compose that great love. What would it take, to become some one who truly believed? It would take heart ache, and it would take fear, and it would take holding your hand through all of this, and here I am, and finally, I believe.