I spent the days imploring to our Lord
To take my life
Because my soul didn't deserve salvation
At night in my room,
hidden,
quietly crying,
praying that in the morning my eyes would open no more
Regularly in my hand was a blade.
Rebuking,
Punishing my body
for the infinite faults I saw.
Each day my world darker.
With no solution.
Far away I saw a light.
Small and little it lid.
But the more I believe the more it grew.
Then I realised.
He was always there,
my selfishness blinding me from the truth.
I was scared to give myself to the Saviour
but in the end I understood,
that was no blade that was going to save me, no punishment to make me feel better.
But only a question of faith. Was I going to open my eyes for a new day?