She keeps me up at night,
And I lie awake
as Peace drenches into fright,
she takes and takes and takes
and screams at me for my mistakes.

She tells me "No, you can't".
But even when I try to fight
My ear she takes and starts to rant
"You CAN'T, you CAN'T, you CAN'T."

And please don't think too less of me,
'Cause there's been times where I fight back
And I tell her who I want to be,
But it's no use when she attacks.
The color inside me fades to black.

If people tell me "Yes, you can",
I start to think maybe that's true.
I begin to smile but there she stands
behind my back a deathly hue
And snarks and laughs, "who, YOU?".

I know what you think,
why keep this friend?
Whose cold-****** words send me to the brink.
Why wouldn't you want it to end?
I'll tell you I try to break and bend.

But her hands choke me with guilt
Her eyes paint me with sick disdain
She tears down the places I rebuilt
And carves out the happy in my brain.

I put up a fight I can't back down
Because in glass and mirrors all around
what I see when I see her,
is that I am my own saboteur.