the ****** next door won't shut up
they're laughing they're just moving mouths
mouths ripe and undeserving
behind the door
they'll shun me
the air is heavy and swollen
I feel it coming on, the pressure
a big blood blister a larvae
slumbering in my room above me
lack of time, ominous, foreboding,
I'll name him,
ugly and garish as a mcdonalds toy
taking up all the space
wriggling above my head
I hate myself, I hate the way I
carry myself, I am ashamed
of being ashamed
I forsake what I want