I drank cups after cups of red liquid,
wanting to drown this heartbreaking longing.

I wanted to lose my sober state; I wanted to lose myself, and I wanted you to come and rescue me. I drank until I can no longer drink further, but still, you never came.

And so I slept through my longing, leaving all my companions in their blissful moment. But every time I woke up and felt my head throbbing, my heart loudly beating, I wanted to tell you I was waiting for you. And so I sat trying to clear my cloudy head, but only sleep came to embrace me.

And then the next day, I knew that these were the things I wanted. To drown myself, to lose myself, and let myself be saved by you. I wanted to feel you cared for me,  I wanted you to help me, or perhaps, scold me and stop me.