It isn't easy spending every day of your life filled with questions. Questions that you're no where near finding the answers to. I feel obligated to turn my life into structured metaphors; unneeded structure is better than none at all, you see. My head is full of question marks, and the sound they make is all together indescribable, and excruciating. Deafening, even. To say that it sounds like impending death is pretty accurate. I can't explain this to people and make sense at the same time, just as it isn't possible to put the feeling of car crashes into words. it's like one minute you're doing as okay as you possibly can and the next, you're falling. Impact can be a deadly thing. Remind me of this when I threaten to jump off a bridge. Maybe you'll scare me straight and I'll stop seeing danger like it's supposed to be a fun thing. Maybe I'll stop spending so much time trying to bite the bullet, and spend more time trying to get out of the firing range. Life is full of maybes and that's the very thing that's killing me at the moment. One can never be certain