Buttery carbs
Trapped in the airport
I really wanted to make that ******* red eye
But I guess not badly enough.

Train stopped midway there
I should have left earlier
I should have taken a stupid expensive uber
But now I sit in a Black Hawks themed cafe
Trying to put aside my disappointment.

Everything feels so fleeting.

But its alright
Its okay
I have the tendency to torture myself at times
No need.

I was thinking about him
While stuck on the train
You ran to the airport, after I woke you up
On the phone at last
They wouldn't let you on the plane
I remember being so disheartened
As a moon sister and I went and had breakfast
Alone, together
Instead.

Because thats just
Thats just
What it is for me right now.

I was feeling hung up
Hung up on how to feel
But little things here and there
Help push me past it all.

I've never been in more of a financial rut
I've never felt more romantically confused
I've never inspired so many.

I take it in, I absorb it like a sponge
This time last year I auditioned for Steppenwolf
Thinking and plotting
I will go if I get in.

I didn't get in
Didn't book it
But they liked my steel toed boots
And I know I'm 3x the artist now
Than I was then.

I listened to Ghost on repeat
Surrounded myself with The Betrayer the next day
Its no
No
It makes total sense
That I may never ever
See him again.

I wonder what you must think or feel
If you ever tap onto your cell phone screen
Try to figure out where I'm at
Or if you wander onto this page
Or into my room while I'm gone.

As women around me say
"You couldn't heal and move on together."
Delete, delete, block, block
Defriend.
I hold true.
I hold true.
Delayed, stuck
Trapped in an airport
Disappointed
At least they didn't charge me.

I'm still a very very lucky woman.