I just wrote half a poem

And deleted every bit of it.


I don't really have anything new to say.

But my heart aches and longs
To give strength and power
To those I cannot physically be there for right now
And my mind longs to wash away all the toxicity
It becomes easier and easier
To face and live my own truth.

Slumping into the quick sand
Of what was and wasn't
Its no surprise he flees before I visit
Its no surprise I mark on a white page
Each day that passes without you
Its no surprise my mind flickers to what you must think or feel
Or that I craft just how to surpass
----------just like these dashes----------
Or that no one really can blame me
I could write or type or paint my face
With the word "Free" a thousand ******* times
Or "****"
Or
Flame
But its me thats gotta be--believe it, see it


I was feelin' a lil blue
Blue about not bein' there
Handin' out menus to fat babies and mothers
Fathers that glance at me from corners
But wet fire from my mouth and sweet revenge
Everyone in big cities is so ******' selfish
But, but, but
Me--filled with love and joy
Palettes of paint
Make me dance on into this Saturday
Living breathing my own truth
Night.