you are a hedonist
selfish, you say
owing nothing
to no one
i agree, smiling,
because i watch you
not watching me
and it is my pleasure
that you do not care
until after
and even then
it is questionable

admittedly,
i am a *******
this way
looking to you for
what by nature
you can not give me
and with envy
as you give it to yourself

the more time i am there
and the more time i am not
i become unconvinced
of my easy complicty
my promises
my integrity
and before long
all too soon, in fact,
i am on the other side of up again

i am much like you
pleasure in pleasure
but without stamina
i can not maintain
seeing thru myself
being seen thru
not being seen at all

departing again
you knew i would
my kind, you said,
in jest
but there seems to be
honesty in everything you say
this is how you are not selfish
giving truth away