my:  favorite color has always been gray, even though my
mother:  never believed me. she
says:  that this isn’t normal for a nine year old. colors like
these:  hint at your mental state. the
things:  I thought about at night made me go into a panic.
“are:  you going to die in your sleep tonight? should you write a last will and testament just in case?” I felt
like:  my heart was trying to jump up out of my throat. my cheeks would turn
red:  and I would put my head between my legs to steady my breathing. I would try to take my mind off of the finality of it all by thinking of anything else — the
diamonds:  that nobody would ever give me, how good medium
rare:  steak tastes as it melts in your mouth
and:  how
precious:  it is that my little brother is still my biggest fan.
and:  how does one have a moral compass if god isn’t at the center moving the arrow? — by believing that you’ll have a
beautiful:  and fulfilling life if you treat other people beautifully.