my head splits

I try to keep my thoughts inside
but they insist on spilling out
and showing my secrets to the world.
every color
shape and
shadow
every light illuminates
what I don’t want
seen

they run through my fingers like sand
when I try to shove them back in

they float away on the slightest breeze
eddying and swirling
on currents of air
that meet and kiss then break apart
each wisp of thought carried away
each dream and half-formed idea
out in the world for all to see

I press my hands to my face
I press and hold
and try to trap