I’m on my own,
nobody holds my hand
or offers me a pencil.
It gets to be too much
is expected and not enough
is kept.
Learning feels like losing
and send offs are more like
****-Offs.

Freshman year,
I was allowed to mess up.
I weeded through people,
and found my best friend
while losing my first
love.

Sophomore year I ruled
the world.
I founded a group, we hung out
all the time and
I had many opportunities
to fall in love.

Junior year is here.
So many relationships ended
because of need and
graduation.
I have a group but I have to wait to
see them.
There has not been an opportunity for love
and I blame my own baggage.

Senior year is next.
I don’t want it to come.
Make it stop.
I can’t do this
anymore.

These are my confessions
of being an upperclassmen.
If only we could understand
we are not too young to thank
and its never too late to do the right thing.

Never thought the right thing would be
a computer on my lap and silence on Saturday nights.
We once danced and drank, but stubbornness is key.
Looking back to being young and bold its just not how
it used to be.
I'm an upperclassmen, and it feels more like the bottom of the world
has cemented me.
Get me out of here.