Many parties and dinner gatherings ended
hours before we wanted everyone
to pack up and go home.
Though surrounded by friends
I’d been taken by the hand and
drawn to the other direction
to leave the teenagers alone
though I was thirteen.

Many trips to the beach became
destinations for my tantrums.
There was never a way my
method of finding comfort would
fulfill what they wanted.

These are still labeled bad memories
and hard situations I had to deal with.
Vacation was something I never looked
forward to nor did I want to be seen
the way I was compared to all
of them.

Now,
when we gather on the Vineyard
at whoever’s house for dinner,
they are okay about it.
It, meaning me,
at the house.

We never sat together
all ten of us young adults til the recent year.
It is nice to be at the table and see how we
went down different paths but managed
to cross now we have grown.

Though years ago when we were meeting
together on vacation,
I dreaded the day and seeing all of you.
You may have stabbed me in the heart by
helping me with sailboats and social skills, so
you won’t see me on a boat and you don’t
have to make up for it and bring me into
the group.
Because you did not **** me.
I like going to the island to see you.
I meant it this time.