If you are confused it is simply because you have not opened your eyes. Open your eyes. Open up your eyes, see with eyes unclouded by hate. You perceive what you perceive, what you see is only a projection to your mind. You must be wise and sort out the thought and feelings that make you sad and the thoughts and feelings that make you happy. You must learn to control your thoughts, if you do not do this then you will feel pain and suffering. Happiness and sadness are all opinion, so there no right way to be happy and there is no wrong way to be happy the same with sadness. All you have to do is feel what feels right for you.