i miss you i miss you i miss you
the words are bitter on my lips
they taste like anguish
heartbreak deception betrayal
so easy for you
careless as you were with my heart
(it's not enough)
i can't help that there's a canyon
at least five hundred miles wide
where your name used to be
i can't rid myself of you
or what i thought was love
it is the shadow beneath my eyes
and the hollow at my throat
the quickening pulse at my wrist
and the blade along my thigh
(laughable)
looking back now
i want to laugh
but it catches in my throat
because i remember the sweet ache
i felt when
i held you kissed you touched you
my fingers curl and flex
itching to wrap around something
anything
(a knife a bottle a throat)
that could possibly dull this sharpness
it's pushing between my ribs
like a slow knife to the heart
every time i think i am
done with you
i fall into that canyon again
and am lost to myself