1.  84003

If you have a rib
to roast, stick in this
zip code  Buy American

2.  HEY AB-BAT!

Stand-ups taking steroids
Now that's funny but
Is it still comedy?

3.  WATCH THE RAB-BAAT

If it made a punchline
Stronger they could steal
from a game of baseball

4.  TU BU

One scared heifer/bovine
on a downhill *****
light 'em up, one fine smoke

5.  HEY BUD

Eighty years of torment
and how you dined hope
that peace does you just fine

6.  SOMEBODY

Hollywood's a *****
Not good enough for me
Biker, T-shirt, and blue jeans

7.  FAMILY PICNIC

had drinks one day out
by the pool with vito
corleone and his crew

8.  MAINE

Aroostook to Kennebuck-
port.  Kataden plays king
too much fishing

9.  MINNEAPOLIS/ST. PAUL

Twin cities make your
mind are you going to
bridge work/home at this time

10.  MINNESOTA

Land of 10,000 lakes
The Mississippi Delta's
Great Beginning

11.  ALASKA

The great white north
The final frontier
Nothing left to find around here

12.  MONTANA

Stripped like a *****
All your ore gone.  Big Sky
Way too cold in summertime

13.  d*mn VIRGINS

I darted my tongue in
Her from behind her
****** shot my eye out

14.  COLORADO ROCKIES

You come up leaving
Kansas and climb, reach
the top, turn the bend, OH MY!

15.  CHEAT NOTES

The war on drugs not
true.  Prescription drug addicts
have their excuses

16.  MAIL CALL

I murdered the postman
For being too nice
Please, next time, don't knock twice

17.  LIFE'S PURPOSE

The mystery to life
is solved.  It's procreation.
Quick, get involved.

18.  SCAREDY-CAT CALL

I want to whisper softly
in your ear.  All the
things I want to dear.

19.  INSULIN NEEDED

Put a little sugar
on it baby.
That's too much.  Diabetes.

20.  NEW JERSEY

Oh yeah!
what was
I
thinking
suing the mob
for ****** me at
the age of
three
social security?

21.  CALIFORNIA

Can't drink the water
Don't breathe the air
It's either raining like hell
or burning on fire there

22.  PALM BAY,  FLORIDA

Alligator gangs with
Shell-less turtles leading
Eat you alive along with
Three foot long
Mosquitoes

A 200lb black cat
lounges
near the garden
of my back yard
the lazy panther

plays
with a fly

23.  SAN ANTONIO

Every airman trained there
knows this one thing
REMEMBER THE ALAMO!