I Promise this is the last time
I Promise this trash bag isn't filed with empty beer cans and
I Promise this stain on my sheets is something healing like apple juice.

I Promise I woke up before noon today
I Promise I wasn't awake waiting wanting to hear from you
I Promise I am not writing about you again.

I Promise today I woke up stronger than when fell asleep
I Promise today the sun reminded me of a safe place and not of the sun we sat under when you said "this isn't the same anymore"
I Promise today I am getting better.

I Promise you I am trying
I Promise you your name doesn't taste like vinegar
I Promise you weren't the only reason I was breathing.

I Promise my parents didn't pay for bail for a drunk and disorderly
I Promise my eyes don't feel like Velcro stuck together when I shut them
I Promise these words are sincere.


I Promise there aren't pins and needles sewing me together
I Promise there is time left for me
I Promise there is love in my heart and I remember what that feels like.

I Promise.

But when you said "I Promise" I Promise you were lying.
If you meant what you said
Then these promises would be true,
But they're not.

I Promise this isn't a goodbye letter.