happy birthday to the first love I ever had
although it ended uglier than I had ever wanted
this person helped me to find who I am and sparked the path of acceptance of everyone
I am now on my own way to trying to accept myself as well

This individual
thinking back
will always be what I want to find in other people
not in an obsessive way
but in a "you give me hope for the humans" kind of way
as much as this person was not perfect
or perfect for me even

this individual showed me that love is possible
that there is such a thing as that feeling of completeness
the feeling of rejoice after finding someone who accepts one's flaws

it showed me that it is possible to think someone is beautiful in their worst state
I know this
because although the love we shared fleeted from beneath us
and our sad hearts broke even more
I am still able to sense this feeling
and what it had been
and that it is alright to cry for what was
and that it is natural for such a feeling to drive you mad
turn you into a ghost of your past self

So Happy Birthday to the first person to make me truly feel for the first time
and despite all of the pain and what ifs
I wish nothing but for this person to find a sense of worth
in themselves and in this world
Like I found in him