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Nov 2011
You’re boiling blood seeps through my veins,
Half of your genes make up my being,
And sometimes your dense reflection appears
When my attitude looks into the mirror. –
I loathe this.
And don’t you dare scream at my mother.
You aren’t a tenth of the person she is.
I’m sick of the tears that leak from my eyes
When I blame myself for how you treat us. –
I loathe this.
Alone in my room after the blunt door slam,
I stare all around through my tired tears
And wonder what the hell keeps me here,
And where do I belong? –
I loathe this.

Lonely in a crowded room
I sit and see the world I grew up in.
Friends and family all around,
So happy, so fulfilled, and here I am empty. –
I loathe this.
They each have their lives fully figured,
They each have their world in their cozy hometown,
They each have a sunny smile spread out,
Each oblivious to any other kind of life. –
I loathe this.
Dozens of children are running about.
I live in slow motion but see in fast forward.
And the scene that plays before my eyes
Lets me know I don’t belong here. –
I loathe this.

Drink in my hand but not in my blood,
The party storms on into the night.
Keep on refilling your empty hearts,
Keep on smoking your washed up souls. –
I loathe this.
This is what you all call living?
This is what you all call fun?
The drugs, the ***, the games, the alcohol?
This is what fulfills you? –
I loathe this.
I’m not one who’s against a good time,
Evident in my affection for a drink,
But all I see when I scan the room
Is a bunch of worthless, vacant people
On an endless road to nowhere fast. –
I loathe this.

None of this matters, but no one cares.
Am I the only one who sees this nonsense?
Or am I just too boring by being me?
All I know is one simple thing:
This is not where I belong.
I feel no home anymore,
And I don’t know where I’m going,
But I know I’m walking in the dark,
And at least I’m stepping somewhere forward.

Take me away, I beg of you.
Kairee F
Written by
Kairee F
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