“I LOVE YOU”* that’s what i said to him.
And i got no reply at all.
No exchanges, nothing in return.
Literally speaking, NOTHING IN RETURN.

That’s one heck of hell for somebody
who’s loving way way too much.
PAIN is all you get, which you endure
no matter how  “you-can-no-longer-stand.slash.bear-it”.
Yet and Yet, you still love the person with all your might.
How ironic it is, right? in spite of this effin’ feeling,
though you don’t deserve to be hurt, still,
you continue to give everything
to this very person you cared the most
when every day, every hour of the day
you hear and feel how your heart
battles with your brain.

You want to let go when actually
you don’t want to. And why is that?
because of the effin’ word LOVE
You just can’t do anything else,
you love until it hurts more and more,
you love even it means hurting yourself,
you love and love until you can no longer feel the pain–
until you look like a fool, numb, and  DUMB ,
but you never gave up, perhaps
never gave up pushing and showing yourself.

Sometimes you don’t actually feel
that you will EVER give up.
Just gotta accept the fact that whatever you do,
he can’t or he won’t love you back.
Accept the pain of having NOTHING IN RETURN.
That’s it! BINGO! KUDOS!

They say “if you really love a person,
you will ask for nothing in return
even if it means not loving you back” , and
I guess that’s how all the enduring thing came from.
And then you will get used to it,
to the same scenario up to the extent that you,
yourself can no longer escape the sensation anymore.

GIVE AGAIN, LOVE HIM STILL, HURT AGAIN.
Well, you just can’t stay away, right?
You can’t last a day without a single word
or news from him, not without
seeing his name on your effin’ cellphone.
At the end of the day, you’ll tell him I LOVE YOU,
while you get NOTHING

The chase is on again, because you’re used to it
even how much you feel the pain
Still, you accept it.
You accept the fact that he doesn’t love you back.
That you are the only one standing alone
playing the game.
“What can i do? I LOVE HIM"
this is all you can say.

And now, you just have to wait
for the day that you will stop.
Pray for the day when ENDURING will be over,
so that you may give him up, at last.

Dream that your hopes would fall down
to Love someone new, Love yourself.
Accept your defeat in the game
called “LOVE: I LOVE YOU, DON’T LOVE ME”
Wait for the moment where your tears
would stop from falling because
you’ve used them  ALL  already.
Until your heart stops from beating,
beating his name.
Until your brain can no longer
process Memories at all.

ACCEPT IT, I must.
HE WILL NEVER LOVE ME,
or perhaps, AGAIN.
An “I LOVE YOU” is something
I could feel for him, and I could give to him…
But it is something I would never have
FROM HIM, and would never be given *TO ME.