My own guardian angel,
You make me laugh and smile
When all I want to do is cry in pain.
You're always there when least expected
And most needed.
In a nearly empty cafe
I find you
Alone
Drinking some coffee
You see me and smile
You sense something is wrong
From the frown upon my face.
I talk.
You listen.
I talk more.
You make stupid jokes.
I lightly chuckle.
That's not good enough for you.
You poke me and tickle me.
I finally leave out an unfamiliar burst of laughter.
I smile.
You give me support when I'm weak;
The weakest I've ever been.
I don't want to need you
But I do.
I try to push you away.
It doesn't work.
You're my best friend--
My guardian angel
Your touch sends shivers down my spine
I wonder if you feel them too.
You stroke my side gently
And pull me into your protective hold.
I want to resist,
But I can't.
It's starting to hurt.
For you are in love with another.
Yet you still smile at me with those eyes.
You touch me as if I'm a delicate flower.
How I wish you felt what I do
When you caress my arm gently.
When we hold hands
I can't help but feel like there's more.
Something there.
Something you're so unaware of.
I know you love her.
I know you're happy.
I love seeing you happy,
Oh, how I wish I was her.
But you're only my guardian--
My best friend.
Nothing more--
Nothing less.
And I will never let you go,
Even through the suffering.
For we will always be there for each other,
And love each other,
Even if it's not the love I want.