Jerry swears someday he's gonna marry thee
but he hesitates to take you on a date
Jerry says no movies that he wants to see
and diner food these days is not as great.

Jerry said he's saving for his future
and likes to see you saving for yourself
though daddy never said the man's Moocher
he's watching Jerry's actions for himself.

Jerry says
Jerry says
I don't care what Jerry says
Jerry is
what he does
if you listen to the buzz
Jerry has
been a spaz
though he's cute and all that jazz
let's see Honey put his money where his mouth is

Jerry said today he wants to stay with you
well you can't believe what comes out of his mouth
Jerry doesn't know which way his head is to
more than likely Jerry's head is pointing south.

Jerry said tonight he's working overtime
and won't be calling you, so go to bed
Jerry thinks that all you want are diamonds dear
expect Cubic Zirconium  instead.

Jerry says
Jerry says
I don't care what Jerry says
Jerry is
what he does
if you listen to the buzz
Jerry has
been a spaz
though he's cute and all that jazz
let's see Honey put his money where his mouth is