Maybe a relative startup
a sequential ***** up
two pointed fingers to the head
the deviation which brinks into
fast-fall, go-for-the-hell-of-it
momentum, an all consuming
build up, edging to the cliff
fall to the expanse of water
plummet with head tilted first
Swimming through days
spinning to endure the suffocation
how one can never save oneself,
how the world's axis must sway opposite
in my head of direction, because
if it did, I would never have to feel like this
Maybe that's why the arrays of the sunshine
passes through me and not over me,
not to blessed by the reminiscent of halo glimmer
keep a still smile, wake to the smell of black coffee
how I am amazed how I haven't burst,
how emotions elapse and thoughts beat
against the side of my brain
and to keep a still smile
sometimes what will I give
for a still mind
and this very thought
scares me