A bitter taste
In a blistered mouth
A harsh shot of *****
Distracts the pain
Of a broken tooth.

Today I battled with a habit
That has fabricated my intentions
It has changed my perception
Of the world I live in
And the abuse I cause myself.

She’s an engineer
Of creativity and hope
And I walk in drunk and helpless
Into her bathroom
Sick over the tiles
And then I seek more.

What kind of person am I?
A killer of all things bright and beautiful
A medicated deliverer of bad news.

The piano she plays so sweetly
And she sings a little too
I hold back the tears
And drink until my eyes can’t see.

What if I pretend to be normal?
Will others respect me?
Will they see my flaws?
And the dishonesty run with my tears.

I cry so much
I’ve crossed so many
I’ve seen so much agony
And I breathed in so much smoke
From my Mother’s cigarettes.
This is the life I lead
Damaged and broken
Corroded with mishaps and instances
That I’m not proud of.

I could deliver a speech
To her and the world
I must take time to write it
With precision and fluency
Relevance and intent.

Watch me falter
Or see me rise.