Tonight I leave the light on
when I go to sleep
because I pretend I'm not the only one awake in this house.

Brother strums his guitar in the other room
when night falls over Hometown Oblivion.
Father slams the door and tells Mother to keep busy
in case her flock has run away during the day.

Sister is sleeping peacefully beside me,
and though I wish I could do the same,
I know it's better off for both of us this way.

I lie awake,
bittersweet memories of my ex-friends and long-lost comrades
keep me company.
Hold my pen, just in case,
my flock visits someone else tonight,
like always.

Warm tears spill onto the pages.
I might as well give up at this point;
can't stop thinking about you, can't stop holding fast to my breathing.
I wish to die in my sleep
because it's driving me insane;
Clutch the crucifix in hopes all this time I've just made a mistake.

If you can hear this unwarranted plea,
listen to me crying and undo.
All the things that I would've done
if I still had you.