every part of you wants to break free from whatever kind of pain this is
it is not the pain of losing someone to the heavens,
but instead of losing someone who is literally an arms length away
straight in front of you, so close you can smell her
touch her
so close you can speak to her

but she does not hear you
she does not feel you
she does not see you

and still, you will have hope
maybe, just maybe she will reciprocate the love

but,

you know what they say about hope, breeds eternal misery

and you will die
every porcelain bone in your body will shatter, your steady breathing will race, your mind will clutter
and your body will collapse

but you will wake up the next morning still breathing,
the sun will still be shining
the birds will still be chirping
the world will still be moving

it never stopped
time never ceased

but for you,

it did, and you died

and you are just a walking corpse now, going through the motions