@Un-named
Stop talking to me as if you know what you’re saying, you and I both know that you’re going through a motion that you never asked for. I feel the presence of a ghost everytime I pass your cold, and life-left form, but you never died, just grew colder and colder until your soul could no longer stand the chill of your frozen form.
And you know what you did, you broke me with your withdrawal, although money was never involved. You went around, scaring me with your promiscuity and crushing the very last thing of a soul that I had. Why? Why hurt me in that way? Why spit in my face as if I were the enemy in an ongoing, unknown war. Why? What is your synopsis? You know what, nevermind anymore.
I could hear the future on the first day I met you, it kept whispering in my ear words that I had constantly pushed into the back of my mind, letting your beauty take over my eyes and fill my brain with the fantasies that you placed there. You toyed with me, with my heart, and for that I must admit I am sad to be around you. You made me vulnerable to a disease that I had never ever felt before, but you dubbed it love, I dub it lust, ****** attraction is all we had, you didn’t want more.
But I did.
I wanted you.
Why couldn’t you accept that? If you were scared then you should’ve said so, hadn’t I showed you my easy-going nature? I never should’ve went with you to the movies that day, never should’ve played your silly games, never should’ve even acknowledged that you existed after the first mistake. Were we a mistake? That was the simple question I had asked you, was it really that hard a probe? Did it really require more than a few seconds of thinking? Well congratulations, You’ve shown exactly how you feel.
I’ll get over it, sure, it’ll take time, but I will, and you knew that which is why you played me so close like that. No, I’m not running back to you like a track-star. I want my way, you want yours, yet only one of us was willing for a compromise, Why? For god’s sake, Look me in the eye and tell me what you thought was the problem. No answer? So typical, I figured you’d exit on your own agenda once your motives were fulfilled. But before you go could you please lock my door back, I was writing before you ruined me and I intend to do so even after hearing this news. Too much has life placed on me to force me to comply with the demands of the god that I have sworn to love, yet everything seems to play me like a drum-set.
Love is war, lust is peace, yet one is perpetual and one is meant as a façade for the true meaning of what the other is supposed to offer. Not straight-forward, but still as ***** as an arrow, nevermind what we say, the world is our journal, hear the poet’s wounded roar.