I’ve never been good at apologies.
Maybe growing up as one of the boys helped that along.
Or maybe it was never talking about feelings.
     My parents never yelled. Arguments were silent.
I've grown into a self sufficient human. One who doesn't need weakness.
     Even more one who doesn't know how to open up.
Not anymore, at least.
And now I think of all the relationships that could have been mended.
And I wish that I knew how to say the important words-
     But it still doesn’t come.