We used to spend hours and hours
-all the time we could-
in places like this.
Then we ran out of time
and now we hurry by and the
leaves change and
nothing is ever the same as it was when
we had hours and hours and nowhere to go and nothing to do
except lay in the grass and look at the clouds and the stars
and think that we had forever.
You’re not what I thought you were
In the beginning
And you’re not what I thought you were
In the end.
As it turns out,
People are greyscale-
Happy and sad
And angry and kind
And spiteful and full of love.
All at the same time.
There can’t be black and white
Because this is the human condition
Perfect and imperfect
And everything in between.
I loved you
And I hated you.
And I couldn’t decide what your intentions were.
Because you are a beautiful and conflicted
soul who gave what you
left me to sort out the rest.
People see a part of your soul.
And they think they know everything.
But you don’t know that I dream of moving to a different country.
You don’t know that my stubbornness matches your own-
but I only use it when it seems worth the fight.
I hate to hurt people. But I will also do what I have to.
And I thought it was funny when we got handcuffed.
I wasn’t afraid of you- just the explosion.
I try to be logical, but I’m a hopeless romantic
I won’t apologize for who I am, in spite of my apologetic nature.
And I do understand love- and I do love you.
In spite of everything. You are more than you know.
But I’ve also moved to a more objective plane of view.
And I’m glad that you saved yourself,
even if there were some casualties along the way.
So many months and nightmares later… and there he was.
She wouldn’t have recognized him if it weren’t for his shoes…
And she realized.
He was just someone who had changed her life.
And now he is someone who no longer has a place in it.
And it feels like calm, quiet acceptance.
The best kind of freedom.
The difference between boys and men
had never been more clear to me than when you became a ghost.
Chivalry might be dead, but you’re a whole other type of gone.
All I ever asked of you was to be civil.
Yet here we are- obviously far past civility,
Licking our wounds,
Whoever said we are better than animals-
Well. They were wrong.
You told me you only go for messed up girls.
But I’m more your type than you could ever imagine.
Trying to learn to say more with less....