Standing up requires too much effort
I grab a hard stick and it helps me up, all I keep thinking about is how this is temporary, because such a stick can't hold me up it'll eventually break, but it doesn't. It breaks me. It broke me. A ******* stick.
I light a couple of candles and turn the music so loud so I wouldn't hear my own thoughts, but it doesn't work. I need to stand up, I try but the weight is too heavy, I try again but something keeps pushing me down. This is not right, why don't I just stay here? it's not so bad, I feel comfortable here, I don't fear falling or failing anymore, and if I stop trying nothing can push me down anymore. I can burry the weight and make a comfortable sleeping place out of it.
I am happy here, here I shall stay.