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Huda 1d
I work for the moment where my mind as as clear as the rising sun.
I keep reminding myself that the sun burns to shine that bright, so it's okay to feel this in the process. The sun also knows when to rise and when to set, it's never wrong andmy religion is telling me if the sun doesn't rise like it always does, it is the end of the world and the begging of the after life. Can I be as strong as the sun?
Yes, I can.
I am the Sun.
Huda 2d
Sometimes I wonder why I tend to almost always **** the muse in my head that gets me writing.
I've facing the sun, I've been facing the moon, I've been facing myself, and I tend to almost always avoid fear.
Fear is one of the strongest emotions I feel, and when I feel it it's real.. And by that I realize that I don't want to write because I know want to know the truth behind all the fear I hold in.
So here goes nothing.
Huda 6d
I wonder if I'm going to ever be in complete control of my emotions, I wonder if I want to have that as well.
It effects all aspects of my life, I water a flower and if it doesn't grow I get all sorts of emotion, every person I let into my life I cannot imagine ever losing them which is wrong but I feel it anyway, if the ocean is frustrated and the waves show it, I feel it too.. When it's calm I'm calm. I want to own things and this is the hardest part, starting with myself to everything I love deeply.. I have wronged myself letting my emotions take control. I cannot feel this heavy anymore, I'm too old for this but I also refuse to never feel again. What is the Grey area? I'll learn to accept it and love this color instead of black or white.
Huda Feb 16
أعيش بزمان كنت أخافه، كنت ادعي الرب ان لا يأتي، أن لا أتذوق المر الذي تذوقته، أن لا
أُهزم أمام الحب، أن لا أضيع، أن لا أتوه، أن لا أتلعثم بكلمات، بحروف ليست حروفي
أقف أمام مرآتي و ارى وجهاً جديدا
وجها يرحب بآلام و يقبلها علما ان القادم أفضل
وجها يشرب المر كل صباح تهيئا
وجها هزم أمام حبيبتي لكن لا يخسر أمام حب النفس
وجها ضاع، تاه تلعثم تألم لكن تأقلم
وجها بشوش و صامت
الا بالمشاعر الصادقة
لا يسكت
Huda Feb 9
My hopeful thinking takes me to a far away place and time in the future, where I'm sitting around my grandchildren in a cozy home that smells of lemon pies and freshly brewed coffee.. Telling them about the monstrous time I've lived in, the cruelty of its sociaty, the brutal family I grew up with and how hideously they'd think of it living in such a good place and growing in such good homes and how they'd appreciate the feeling of peace, safety and love.
But that's just my hopeful thinking, because the universe is telling me that I'm just a man who will live a long lonely life and probably die alone, the universe is telling me that my hopeful thinking is what I think will save me but it's what will end up killing me when I'm 85. The universe lost hope in me, but I refuse to lose it. I see hope. And I still hope. I'm full of it.
And my grandchildren will read this.
Huda Jan 26
Take a peek, is it good enough?
Do you know what you want?
Would you rather choose for it to be chosen for you?
Do you know what you want?
Do they know what you want?
Does anyone?
Do you?
Huda Jan 26
Different colors, brand new shade to the rainbow...
a little bit dusty but that's exactly how I like it.
I've come to a realization that I decide. I pick. I choose.
Where the flow is going and when.
"You talk when you cease to be at peace with your thoughts"
When to be at peace with thoughts and when not to, I get to be angry, I get to be upset and let it all out as long as it's not hurting anyone.
Who gets to enter my cave and who's not allowed in.
If you've been in and out more than twice, I better not see your face anywhere close my cave you *******.
I decide. I pick. I choose.
When walking into a black hole, it's on me if I get lost, if I never find my way back or if stay there and call it my home.. Because it was my decision, my choice. I know it's on me.
Who flies on my ******* dragon.
I decide. I pick. I choose.
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