When my sister played Clair de Lune I’d go into her room and sit on the floor with my ear to the side of the piano so close that the sound would fill my mind with the image of the long, coiled strings vibrating, glowing golden in the darkened box.
I could hear my sister’s feet dampening and undampening the pedals, muting the strings, then letting them ring, resonating, one note overlaying another, could hear the creak of her piano stool and smell the smell of wood dust, like old sheet music, and my ear would pulse, almost hurting from the sound of the hammers striking steel.
And I would begin to imagine things, different things each time: my aunt in a blue flowered house dress standing in her kitchen holding a jar of homemade pickles, her thin white hair always in tight pin curls.
Or I’d be alone, in a long, softly lit hallway, the walls covered with wainscotting and lavender striped wall paper yellowing near the ceiling. At the far end of the hallway, a solarium, and beyond that a balcony glimmering in sunlight.
Or I’d be in a field with small, white flowers bowing with the weeds rhythmically and sensing that I was loved by someone.
And it would be that my sister’s fingers were pounding deep into my chest, and always, always by the end of the piece I’d ask her to play it one more time.