i sit in my car
Waiting at the same red light as yesterday and probably tomorrow
and my chest actually hurts
feels churned over like butter
(though usually when i speak of butter it's in good light)
i'm in the jungle in the woods in the ocean but no matter what i'm me
that's a hard thing to realize
over and over again in the same moment
"hold onto something"
when my chest hurts so bad my heart has no room to live

the light finally turns
no more anticipating
I can finally breathe again