I have quit deciding who I am.
It's too late to worry about it.
Now I pay more attention to what I do.
Time is running out. The deck
is stacked against me. It is nearly
impossible to consider the world
and yourself at the same time. Close
your eyes and try it. When they open
your children will be grown
and you will have missed your life.
Thought itself is suspect. What do
thoughts bring but mystery and worries.
Better the empty-headed monk scribbling
poems to nothingness than the cranky
scholar insisting on unimportant truths.
The deck is certainly stacked against
the scholar. I haven't decided about the monk.
I guess the question is what to do next
I believe I will take a nap and hope
for a vision. That seems a great compromise.
Nothing is stacked against naps except time
which matters not as we are only here for a moment.
After I wake up I'll invent a new calendar
so that the world slows down and there is
more time to kiss your forehead and keep you safe.
  ~mce